Friends are God’s way of taking care of us

Holla holla again peeps! First of all, I want to announce here that I'd done my VIVA (presentation of my final year project). Thanks God, it turn out well!! hehe What a really great relieved I feels just now. Plus I'd fully enjoyed my free day today. Even though I felt a little bit disappointed because we'd cancelled the karaoke plan after VIVA + haven't attend the farewell party to my great respectful lecturer _DR.HOW_I really want to be there with them last evening! I surely have a lot to tell her, how much she'd inspired me in doing my FYP. She even made me cried in my first FYP's presentation last year, and yes, it taught me a lot. THANKS so damned much DR.HOW. REALLY! Omg, such a long introduction isn't it hahaha..nevermind. lets continue to the main entry for today. 

*[F]*[R]*[I]*[E]*[N]*[D]*[S]*

I have a lot of friends!!!!

So many friend I can't listed here ( for it was a very long lists to write here).

I really feels that, God is so awesome. He really considered our feeling. Isn't it so >speechless<, for He even thought about this little (but important) relationship? Wohaa, I feels so blessed for He have gives me a lot of friends. Someone who love you, miss you, share with you, laugh and cry together, and even a friend who stabbed you from behind. Yeah, above all it teach me to learn about life and grow up faster. 

Have you had any friends like that???

wahh, what a relationship I've now. Thanks God for giving me opportunity to have friends!! Really thanks.

Hurm, but this entry today is written as I suddenly remembered someone who really important in my life. 

A friend that I love so much, I care so much, and a person who I can't afford to be separated with. 

But, its seems like we weren't in that relationship anymore nowadays. Whose faults? I don't know either. You know peeps, I really feel hurts when she told me (via fb) that she had engaged. I was really sad and yes, I cried. Why? Why she didn't tell me earlier? Why she didn't invite me? But to think about it again, we have been so distant lately. 

Is it my faults?

I don't know either.

Back to years ago, we really had a very close BFF. Whoever, Wherever and whatever happen, it involved both of us. Yeah, we even nearly missed the exam paper once. Reason? I accompanied her dressing up her hair. She was so cute on that day. Plus, we had done so many things together. Enjoyed, laughing and crying together. I still remember, when I cried at our Teachers day lunch, she is the one who understand me the most. It isn't like the other friends didn't but, maybe it was because she is my BFF, that is why I felts her concern.

She even cried when we decided to put a distance in our friendship for the sake of our studies. Yeah, our exam results wasn't good but we really need to pass the PMR exam. Must! We didn't want people said behind us, "serve your right, rock annoying girls". So, here is the story. When the PMR exam was just around the corner, we suddenly realized that we'd played so much, forgetting about studies. So one day, we decided to put a distance while in the class. She sit near the teacher's table while I stayed near the entrance door. She cried, I didn't ( so far I remembered ). Back to those days, crying in front others students is a very unacceptable manner for me, so I didn't cry. But, it isn't like I didn't cried at all, in fact I cried a lot at home. I miss our BFF relationship so damned much. And thanks God, we made it. Our PMR result allowed us to entered the Pure Science Stream Class.

But, in the middle of it, she had moved to Labuan with her family. What a very blue day for me. The days before she went to Labuan, she asked to met with me. I go and I prepared a speech and gifts for her indeed but I handled it wrongly. I didn't answer her calls wisely, and I simply said "ok, just go" something like that. But she insisted on meeting me, and she waited me for hours. 

I went home but she was there, waiting for me at our bus stop station. It was really a hurtful for me to see her. I really don't want to see her! really! Because I don't want to cry in front others people in the city. So I end up hurting her pride by simply looking at her without any words. How stupid I am isn't. The gifts and speech I'd prepared, I still have it in my room in the mean time. It was still there until nowadays. My boyfriend even ask why don't me just give it to her nowadays? Huh, what a thought. I do thought about it, and I simply put it my mind that I'll surprised her in her engagement day. I will surely attend her engagement and wedding ( I decided before ). But I lost that time, I didn't go. I don't know. 

I really sad, and I do feel hurts for she didn't invite me. Huh, it might also because of me peeps. After years, I finally met her when I further study at Labuan Matriculation College. The first time I met her, I was so damned >speechless<. What a great I am! Stupid! I didn't greet her well. It was so awkward! And again I spoiled it. I couldn't say what I really want to say. Of how much I care and how much I hurts when she moving away from my side. ( well, a girl with a girl relationship, a healthy relationship, NOT LESBIAN okay! remember that peeps)

So, after that we were like strangers. 

until now

yes, until now

wuhuuu peeps, I think I had write a lot for this entry. 

As for my conclusion (effect from doing the thesis), don't loss your BFF because you don't have words to describe you feeling. Just follow your heart, speak it louder. Don't loss a friend that you really enjoyed with. Don't miss the chances. 

anywhere, may God bless you 

this so called fellow

"EVIE SANIEL"

may your life is full with God's awesome love. 

Love form this far, WAT =)